‘My fort’ is a song I wrote a couple of years ago, maybe four(which is more than a couple). I don’t have a time perspective, so a while back is better to say. It’s about the classic subject: heartbreak. It was just a short romance, but before that, I had kind of closed off, kind off totally… I had had enough of heartache I thought, so I didn’t let anyone close to me and was actually very satisfied with the situation. I actually was so comfortable so the thought of being single for the rest of my life was very appealing. Then I met this very intelligent guy and we had great conversations and my heart started to open up. Since I wasn’t used to walk this ground of falling in love anymore, I was like Bambi on ice. And so thirsty for love, since that’s a kind of the core of life.
Me and this guy had different lifesituations that didn’t work together and the terms he put up wasn’t for me so I ended it. My heart was very fragile since it had been locked in and it, of course, hurt a lot, as a heartbreak does.
The day after the ending of the romance, I went to a café and another friend came over, she asked me how I was, I told her that I was sad and asked how she was. She was extremely happy and had just met a really nice guy. She kept on talking about this guy and how madly, romantically in love she was. She kept on talking and talking and at that moment, to hear someone talking about this amazing, romantic love was the last I wanted to hear about. For me I would have felt great if she had listen to me, because I was sad, then I would have enjoyed to listen to her, ’cause I love to hear about my friends happiness. Anyway, after an hour I’ve had enough of her up in the sky-story, went home and I started to cry. Her talk just pushed me over.
Suddenly, the song came to me and demanded to be written! So within a second I stopped crying, got a pen and paper in front of me and the song was written. Just like that.
I’m grateful for this whole situation, ’cause without this guy, it would have taken longer to open up my heart and without this girl pushing my feelings I wouldn’t have gone home crying, and then maybe this song would never have been written.
And what is life without love? Doesn’t matter if it’s a parter, friend, dog or whatever. A closed heart can never love and it’s impossible to love someone that doesn’t dare to be loved. There’s no safe place, ’cause without connection, you’re not living at all.
Better to get a broken heart, than to never love. ‘Cause if you never love, you’ll never live. (Hahaha, enough quotations of my own songs!)
Back to ‘My fort’. I’ve recorded it by myself with my present skills of recording, I’ve done it very suitable in my castle, behind thick walls, in Italy. Even though it’s no fancy recording, I do hope you enjoy ‘My fort’ and the lyrics you can find underneath if you want to.
I closed my heart, for any love to enter.
Built up my own fort, my own shelter.
Walls were strong and reliable, for years to come.
Life were fantastic, and nothing could go wrong.
Rain, wind and thunder, couldn’t tear down my walls.
Of course, they needed mending, but I could fix it all.
I proudly strolled around my castle, not knowing that I’d missed.
A brick, which was your entrance, and I was softly kissed.
Inside my fort, behind those walls, I had no escape.
My heart was lost, although my mind tried to hit the breaks.
I fell so fast, I fell so deep, but you had other things to do.
So I ‘m back to rebuild my fort, alone, while missing you.